How To Transform What Drains You into What Energizes You

Ever feel like you're running on empty, with more things in your life draining you than filling you up? Let's change that together. Our latest episode is a journey into the art of energy management, with a personal twist—I share my own experiences with energy drainers, like family dinners, and reveal how shifting the context to one-on-one coffee chats with family members leaves me feeling rejuvenated. We're not just talking about the obvious energy vampires; sometimes, it's the subtle shifts in our day-to-day interactions that make all the difference.

Grab a notebook and join us as we guide you through a hands-on list-making activity designed to help you pinpoint exactly what in your life is sapping your strength and what's giving you a boost. You'll learn how to reframe and potentially transform your energy drainers, or boldly eliminate them altogether. This isn't about enduring, it's about thriving by aligning your daily practices with your core values and making intentional, empowering choices. So, tune in and start cultivating a more energized existence with us today!

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

Hey there, I've got an exercise for you today that I think you might enjoy. That will help you identify what drains you and what fills you up. Sometimes just by drawing awareness around who, where, when, which things are draining us and which ones energize us is all that we need to shift our energy and operate in a more efficient way. We'll also touch on influencers, things that influence us. Keep in mind that different things influence us positively and or negatively in different situations. For instance, if one of your greatest energetic influencers is emotional, you might be energized when you receive a positive text from someone you care about and find that it actually makes you more engaged in whatever you are doing. Or if the text from the same person was less than positive or caused you some kind of worry or negativity, it might then have the negative effect of draining your energy. So get out your notebook and we're going to make a list of all the people, places and things in your life that fill you with energy. Include any habits or rituals you have that energize you, any places you go, any thoughts. So you're making a list of all the people, places and things in your life that fill you with energy. You can make this a column on one side of your page, if you like. Now, on the other side, you're going to make a list of all the people, places and things in your life that drain you of energy, and again include any habits or rituals that you have that exhaust you. So we're going to be including things on each list that are self-generated as well as things from our external worlds that influence us. So you can pause the track, if you like, while you're writing this out, and when you return, I'm going to ask you to choose one item from your list that drains you of energy and write it down, and I want you to consider these questions about that one item. Is there any circumstance in which you might be influenced by this item on your list in a way that actually fills you with energy? Think about it. So, although it stood out to you as something that drains you, just get curious about if there's any circumstance in which you might be influenced by this item or person in a way that actually fills you with energy at times. Once you've discerned that, go ahead and write it down. So you're going to look at each item on your drain list and then you can consider what you could do to turn this item on your list, this person, this place or this habit into something that fills you with energy. And again, consider if there's any circumstance in which you might actually be influenced by this item or person on your list in a way that actually fills you with energy. So I'm going to give you an example.

Speaker 1: 4:09

That's a bit confusing perhaps, so I'll give you an example of something that drains my energy. Trying to express myself at family dinners drains my energy, but it fills my energy when connecting one-on-one with family members over coffee. So what did I learn from that? I learned that expressing myself is important when I'm with my family, but in the context of a family dinner it just brings me frustration and drains me. But there are times when I do remember connecting one-on-one with family members over coffee, so those same family members actually fill me with energy when the circumstance is right. Do you see what I mean? Now, some items on your list you won't be able to do this with, and those are the ones we're just going to get rid of. But go through it with the ones that actually could be converted.

Speaker 1: 5:25

It may be that not all items on your list can be converted from draining you to energizing you, and this is an opportunity for you to take a closer look at what you've been tolerating and why. You see, we put up with a lot of things. We really get drained by trying to show up to our values in a circumstance that is less than ideal, by trying to push through by using grit, by making it work and sometimes that's a really, really useful tool but by drawing awareness around what drains you and why and under what circumstances, and then looking at that to sort of excavate and figure out why it's important to you, because usually when things drain you it's because they're impinging on something that's important to you. So, for instance, if you have, I don't know, maybe a friend who monopolizes the conversations and that drains you, that's stepping on your value of connection, let's say, because how much connection can you have when the other person's doing all the talking? Or perhaps with empathy, where you don't feel that the person you're speaking with is empathizing or considering you in the conversation? So that can be very, very draining, especially if you try to put up with it Before you get rid of that friend or get rid of that situation. Because it's on your drain list. You're going to look at it and you're going to ask yourself is there any context or situation in which talking to my friend does not drain me and actually might energize me? And that's where you get creative. That's where you can create a scenario in which this value of connection of yours with your friend can now be converted into something that energizes you, as opposed to draining you. I hope that makes sense.

Speaker 1: 7:48

Awareness is key. Knowledge, as they say, is power. Right, and I'm not talking about book knowledge per se, although that's great too. I'm talking about self-knowledge. When you tap into your own truth and recognize where you can make shifts that will positively affect you, as opposed to not make any shifts and stay in places that drain you, then you're opening up a whole world of opportunity. So, as you make these lists, you will find things that previously drained you that can be converted into things that energize you. Likewise, you will find some things that cannot be converted, and that is perfectly okay.

Speaker 1: 8:47

Again, knowledge is power. What you do with the knowledge is where change happens. So if we think about all of these scenarios as taking up energy, it comes down, at the end of the day, to how would you like to spend your energy when you're drained, you already have spent a lot of your energy and it becomes more difficult to put up with, to tolerate, to do any of these things to get through, whereas when you convert or let go of things that drain you to something that energize you, then you're creating energy your own beautiful natural resource. So have fun with this and take all the time you need. Remember it's all about learning and learning about yourself. I'm Lisa Hopkins. Thanks so much for listening. Stay safe and healthy, everyone, and remember to live in the moment.